a skeptical eye on pop culture and public discourse
Save Paul, the Precogctopus! ( #paul #worldcup #germany #precogctopus )
People don't realize it, but Octopi are super-smart
. They can shapeshift,
solve puzzles that would make a chimp toss its feces in frustration
. Paul, the "
, who resides in a German aquarium,
predicted that Spain would beat Germany in the World Cup semifinals.
Now Germans want to kill and eat Paul!
It's not Paul's fault that his mollusk brain is so advanced that it allows him to tell the future. Don't kill the messenger. You people are monsters!